I'm to the last few weeks of my pregnancy, and its been a tough pregnancy to say the least, but it seems like within the last couple weeks I've been emotional and extremely stressed. With this little one, as my due date approaches, I feel less and less ready for it. More scared then confident. More anxiety, then excitement. Not only the typical labor fears, but there are just so many unknowns. Am I ready to take this on? I'm I the right person to be his mom? Is it really going to be ok? Honestly right now I have lots of doubts, and just praying that there will be no other complications when he arrives. I've tried to picture him in my mind. How severe will his condition be? What will he look like? I can't seem to picture how any of this is going to pan out.....But there is another part of me, a stronger part that knows my Heavenly Father loves me, and our family. His hands have been in this from the beginning. He's been there during my lonelier moments, and made my darker days feel light. He's sent so many little tender mercy's that has helped made getting ready for this long process so much easier. Probably an 18 year process. From my first ultra sound to our last surgeon interviews, we would not have been able to do it alone. I've looked back at people who I've crossed paths with at points and time in my life, who have now helped things just fall into place. People who I never thought that I would talk to or see again, who have become my best friends and strongest supports. I cant believe how much this has already changed my perspective on a lot of things. Whats really important in life, and whats not important at all. Family is the most important thing. This little guy will be such a great addition and blessing to our family. I'm scared of the unknown yes, but I am happy. Only 4 weeks to go!
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